Cheryl Cole Resorts to Cuddling her Pooch

Rather than snuggling up with her untrustworthy husband, Cheryl Cole has turned to the most faithful man in her life, her Chihuahua Buster. After Girls Aloud performed in Brighton last night, Cheryl was reunited with her other companion, who got a ride on her lap from the show to her hotel. Nicola Roberts acted as chauffeur for the evening.

To editorialize for a moment… what an adorable little creature! I think I would probably choose him over Ashley any day. Yes his eyes are bit beady, but those ears are just plain precious! And I’m sure she has a purse somewhere that fits him in it just perfectly. (How emasculating for him.)



Link: With Ashley Still in the Doghouse, Cheryl Cole Turns to a Faithful Companion - Her Chihuahua

Hump Day Celebration: Lukas Podolski... In Bed

Lukas Podolski in bed
by calciofan

Ferosh Item: 2009 Ferrari GT California

Soon to be found in a ditch or pulled over by the fuzz near every big name training ground in Europe, this hot new ride is the first of its kind to have a retractable hard top.



Link: Ferreira California Revealed

Slick or Ick: The Clarke Brothers

These two lower leaguers look like they might have some hottie potential. According to teammates both have a real sense of humor, pulling gags on the lads all the time. Maybe if you’re in for a good laugh, check out this younger and much poorer version of the Neville brothers.



Nathan’s Bio in Brief (upper left)
Age: 24
Nationality: English (born in Halifax)
Height: 185 cm. (6 ft. 1 inches)
Weight: 80.81 kg (178 lbs.)
Position: Defender
Honours: #43 on FourFourTwo’s list of 2006 Top 50 Football League Players
Marital Status: Unknown

Tom’s Bio in Brief (upper right)
Age: 20
Nationality: English (born in Halifax)
Height: 180 cm. (5 ft. 11 inches)
Weight: 77.18 kg (170 lbs.)
Position: Defender/Midfielder
Honours: Played for England U-18’s and U-19’s
Marital Status: Currently dating someone

Footballers Are Idiots: Arm Wrestling Gone Bad

Lee Thorpe, 32, of Rochdale FC broke his arm in an arm wrestling match on the team coach traveling to Darlington this past Saturday. Manager Keith Hill was reluctant to name Thorpe’s arm wrestling opponent, but teammate Chris Dognall, while speaking to BBC Radio Manchester, was quick to divulge the culprit. Rene Howe was said to be his challenger when his arm broke in three different places. Who gets beaten up by a guy named Rene? I mean, seriously.

Howe was quoted after the Darlington game as saying:

“We do a bit of arm wrestling on the way to matches for a bit of fun and Lee challenged me even though I'd beaten him badly before. I warned him he was going to suffer, but I didn't expect to break his arm. We were wrestling and then there was a loud crack and it turns out he'd broken his arm in three places.”

Link: Thorpe in Arm Wrestling Accident

Nancy Dell’Olio Reaches Out to Nature

The ex of former England manager, Sven Goran Eriksson, Dell’Olio has had her fair share of disappoinments. Whoever sent her out in public in this travesty is yet another example of how she’s been let down. Attending the Glamour Awards in London's Berkeley Square, Dell’Olio was far from living up to the standards of said award show.

I think what’s missing are some gnomes, elves, pixies, and other woodland floor creatures? She should have had a midget as her date and dressed him as a gnome. That would have been FEROSH!

She needs a new stylist, or at least a friend or a mirror. Good luck next time.

Link: Nancy Dell'Olio's Bizarre Floral Dress Turns Heads at Awards Ceremony

WAG Alert: Abi Clancey Gets New “Project”

Being touted as a “domestic abuse liability” after she was caught hitting poor Peter Crouch outside a club, Abi Clancey might be compared to a WASP-like version of Naomi Campbell minus the super in front of the model. But Miss. Clancey has a new project in her hands that will hopefully keep Peter out of harms way for a while. Abi will host, along side George Lamb and fellow model Michelle de Swarte, a hip new show titled, The Fashion Project.

Each episode will have celebrity guests, segments testing fashion favourites with high street bargains, and the marketing is directed towards those who are fascinated with the subject. Some of the topics to be discussed...

"We'll look at things like how a pair of Louboutins fair against a pair of Primark's best and how will Agent Provocateur knickers compare to M&S's trusty pants?"

The show will premiere in the fall on ITV2.



Link: WAG to Test Drive Fashion in New TV Role

Transfer Talk: Chelsea Sign a Different Jose

Jose Bosingwa has completed his transfer from FC Porto to Chelsea today with the agreement of personal details and passing of a medical. Whether the rising Portuguese star is worth his £16.2 million fee, we will have to watch the EURO 2008 competition to get a closer look.

In my opinion, Chelsea have signed a real uggo. The unibrow must go. Maybe we can counter the uggo with a real beaut. Rafael van der Vaart, perhaps? Nummy!



Link: Bonsingwa Seals Blues Move

Footballers Are Idiots… Even Premier League Champions

Rio Ferdinand Couldn’t Get Into His Own Party



After winning the Premier League and attending their seasonal awards ceremony, the Manchester United lads had a party with their WAGs at the 235 Casino in Manchester. By requiring ID at the door, players secured that the stalking public, such as a few Kickettes I know, wouldn’t get anywhere near the fun, and some of their players as well. Rio Ferdinand, being the incredibly forgetful individual that he is (remember that drug test), left his ID at home, and it was 20 minutes before he and his girlfriend Rebecca were finally permitted to join the rest of the team in their celebrations. If this man can’t even organize a party, how can we expect him to organize the England International Squad, ay?

Besides that, all the girls looked lovely. (Coleen Mcloughlin, Lisa Carrick, and Leanne Brown especially.)



Link: Ferdinand Gets a Yellow Card

Separated at Birth: Owen Hargreaves and Ozzy Lusth

Owen Hargreaves and Ozzy Lusth have both been survivors, one in football, and the other on the incredibly over-rated television series.

Ferosh Item: Sarah Jessica Parker Tries a Bit of British Style

This doesn’t really have anything to do with footballers or WAGs, but I just couldn’t resist this fashion forward individual. (Someone maybe the WAGs should take on as a role model.) SJP looked totally ferosh in a fetching green hat designed by Philip Treacy. She looks absolutely fabulous. I love that she made an effort to be cultural.

All of the Sex and the City girls were in Leicester Square for the premiere of their new film based on the HBO television series.

Link: Sex and the City Hits London

UPDATE: WAGs, were infact, in attendance at the premiere. Alex Curran-Gerrard, Sheree Murphy, and Louise Redknapp enjoyed the red carpet photogs and all looked amazingly lovely. Yes, even Alex.

Footballers Bad Rap

A couple Chelsea stars are apparently recording a hip-hop duet. John Obi Mikel (or John Mikel Obi, nobody really knows), left, and Didier Drogba, right, have become so interested in music that they want to create their own. This is bad and I don't see it ending well.

Remember, Drogba also recorded a track, called Skin, with Michael Essien, center, and Wills and the Willing to promote anti-racism in sport. I don’t presume those sales were exactly platinum rated.


Link: John Obi Mikel in For Cup Vinyl

Bikini Season Bump: Louise Redknapp

Louise Redknapp, 33, is 3 ½ months pregnant. Her husband Jamie Redknapp, 34, and their son Charley, 3, must be very excited to welcome in the new edition to their footballing family legacy. Everyone be prepared to see some baby bump action during bikini season.

Link: Louise Redknapp is Pregnant: No More Modelling

Chelsea’s Seasonal Awards Presented

Chelsea’s Award Show was this evening and here are the results:

Player of the Year (voted by the fans)
Joe Cole


Players' Player of the Year (voted by his peers)
Ricardo Carvlaho


Youth Player of the Year
FA Youth Cup Squad (yes the ENTIRE squad)


Special Recognition Awards
Frank Lampard (for scoring over 100 goals for the club)
John Dempsey (for is extensive charity work)

Goal of the Season (voted by the fans)
Juliano Belletti v. Tottenham


Link: Chelsea Awards Presentation

Gooner Lot Throw Flamini Farewell Party

Before Mathieu Flamini heads off to a new Italian villa in the sun, his teammates at Arsenal arranged a lovely going away “party” at the trendy Raffles nightclub on Kings Road. Judging by the pictorial evidence some of these footballers forgot to look in the mirror before leaving their mansions. Get a stylist, seriously.



Link: Gunner Flamini Says Arivvederci

Footballers Are Idiots

CASE #1: There Are No More Parking Spaces Left in the Manchester



Wayne Rooney and Rio Ferdinand have both been caught parking illegally in Manchester over the past week. But Rooney came out on the luckier end of things when he spotted the warden lurking around his new £170,000 Bentley Turbo which was parked in a loading bay while he and Coleen did a bit of shopping. Being the person that Rooney is, he decided to have a bit of a moan over the possible £30 ticket. Unlike on the pitch, Rooney’s moaning actually acted to dissuade the warden from writing the ticket. Thank goodness because with his £60,000 a week salary how could he afford such a penalty! BOLLOCKS!



Link: Rooney Goes Head to Head with Parking Warden

CASE #2: Ashley Cole Goes Clubbing Sans Wedding Band



Ashley Cole decided to have a boys night out with Chelsea teammates Shaun Wright-Phillips and John Obi Mikel while his wife Cheryl performed in Glasgow with Girls Aloud Wednesday night. Sans wedding ring of course. The boys enjoyed dancing and drinking at Chinawhite, of all places. I’m sure Cheryl must be thrilled.

Link: Ashley Cole Clubbing without His Wedding Ring

Personal Anecdote: Random Man U. Stranger

This is a totally true story.



I’m at my part time job at a movie rental store, and this guy brings his movies up to check out. He has a British accent. So of course, my overly curious personality can’t resist asking him where’s he’s from. His response is Manchester. (Bloody hell…) I tell him how I love of football and wonder where his allegiances lie, crossing my fingers for City or possibly a lower league side. Much to my dismay, but not surprisingly, his response is Manchester United. He asks if I know them. (Huh? If I have already professed my love for football, obviously I know Manchester United, only the most popular club in the world, with the most punchable fans.) My response can only be, “Unfortunately. I’m a Chelsea supporter.” Then he says something that’s so astonishingly witty and British, I almost piss myself.

“Yeah, I think they make stationary that says that.”... Seriously? Do they? Where can I buy some?

Haw very Manc of him. Don’t get me wrong, I had my doubts when Mourinho left and “The Special One” was replaced by The Toad,” but at this very moment, I have never been more impressed and proud of my team. (Yes, MY team.) Maybe it’s because it’s always more fun to cheer for the underdogs, because when they win it feels that much more miraculous. I actually feel bad for Manchester United fans. There can be no miracles, only disappointments. (And having to stare at the mugs of Rooney and Tevez on the telly week in and week out can’t help either.)

Frank Lampard: Man in Black

No, I don’t mean Juventus.



After spending time with his friends and family while grieving over his mother’s passing, Frank Lampard has returned and seems to be taking his emotional pains and converting them into pure footballing aspiration. Putting Chelsea into the Champions League Final and taking the Premier League title down to the final day of the season, Lampard and Co. have shown strength, character, and perseverance.

Not everyone will agree. There are still those cynics out there who can’t see the heroics in Frank scoring a penalty just days after his mother passed away of pneumonia. They deem this part of the job, part of being a professional. These detached individuals obviously don’t know the person Frank Lampard is, or what he represents to many fans of the game. And they also, obviously, don’t have a soul.

When he stepped up to that penalty spot and scored against Liverpool, it brought tears to my eyes. He was taking on a personal responsibility that most don’t enjoy on a normal day, but at this stage, and with so much personal turmoil, Frank was a courageous and statuesque figure on the penalty spot. (All while sending Reina the other way.) And when someone had asked him after the match, "What on earth were you thinking," Frank replied nonchalantly, "What do you mean? ... I always take the pens."

That’s what Frank represents to me; a standard, a staple, an individual beyond that of comprehensible classification.

Link: Frank Lampard Has Grown Up
Link: Failing the Frank Lampard Litmus Test

Slick or Ick: Michael Rensing

He's no Carlo Cudicini, but he's infinitely better than his Bayern Munich counterpart, Oliver Kahn.

Bio in Brief
Age: 23 (soon to be 24 on the 14th)
Nationality: German
Height: 188 cm. (6 ft. 2 inches)
Weight: 86 kg (189 lbs.)
Shoe Size: 46 (wonder what that means?)
Honours: 3 Bundesliga titles ('05, '06, 08') and 3 German Cups ('05, '06, 08')
Marital Status: Sorry ladies, he currently has a girlfriend named Melanie

Mission to Moscow: Blues v. Reds

Manchester United 1 Barcelona 0 (AGG 1-0)



After their disappointment over the weekend, Manchester United came out steamrolling. Paul Scholes ended his goal drought with a superb volley on fourteen minutes. The Red Devils’ back four did well to hold off the advances of Messi, Eto and Henry to secure a clean sheet and a spot in the finals.

Chelsea 3 Liverpool 2 (AGG: 4-3)



Panned out to be a boring draw between these two English sides, it was nothing short of a miracle to see the excitement and suspense created between the two matches. With John Arne Riise’s last minute own goal in the first leg, the second leg could have been held to a 0-0 draw for Chelsea to still advance, but there’s nothing thrilling in that kind of football. Chelsea decided to come out guns blazing, and dominated the entire first half with Didier Drogba scoring on the 33’. But after halftime, Liverpool seemed like an entirely different squad, scoring on 64’ to even the tie, and then holding Chelsea’s goalscorers to go into extra time. And when Michael Ballack was brought down in the penalty box on 98’, Frank Lampard stepped up to send Reina the opposite way. Lampard pointed to the sky and kissed his black armband in dedication to his mother, then kissed his hand and pointed at his father in the stands. Just before the extra time break, Drogba scored a second to seal Chelsea a solid lead on 105'. But not without the efforts of Babel, who on 117’ slotted a screamer from about 35 yards past Petr Cech to give Liverpool a bit of hope in the dieing minutes. And when the final whistle blew, Chelsea had secured themselves a spot in the final in Moscow... finally.

Link: Lampard Man of Steel as He Helps Chelsea to Dream of Moscow Final (this article totally brought me to tears)