29 September 2008
Nereida Gallardo: Lost in Translation
The whole reappearance of whatsherface has me a little perturbed, but in the end, we all get to laugh at her expense, right? In reading some of her tell-all interview, there are some obvious signs that I believe foreshadow the eventual demise of her “relationship” with Mr. Ronaldo. Perhaps translating between the Portuguese and Spanish languages is more difficult than we had originally assumed. Captain Obvious is with me today to help translate for whatsherface.
She Says: “He is very good in bed. That’s why I was with him. We had sex the first night we met.”
Captain Obvious Answer: You’s a ho.
She Says: “The city is a little bit sad and the nightclubs close early. Life was only PlayStation, movies on TV and sex. But his house is impressive, with three floors.”
Captain Obvious Answer: He was embarrassed to take you out because… You’s a ho.
She Says: “There were some problems with his family as they were a little jealous.”
Captain Obvious Answer: They knew he was making a fool of himself by eventually taking you out in public because… You’s a ho.
She Says: “I was upset by the way he finished the relationship, which to me seems 100 per cent cowardly. He is very immature.”
Captain Obvious Answer: Duh… but you’s still a ho.
Link: Ronaldo Dumped Me By Text