20 August 2008

England v. Czech Republic: Thesaurus Work and Scarlet Letters

j.cole and terry

I couldn’t be anymore embarrassed about being an England fan right now than if our captain was Willy Wonka, or perhaps an oompa loopa. (And I LOVE John Terry.) Besides the fact that we scratched out a draw in the final minutes (thank you Joe Cole, a Blue Boy may I add), our defense was dismal, our offense was wretched, and our midfield was basically undetectable.

How many ways can you say “pathetic”: doleful, heartbreaking, lamentable, miserable, mournful, moving, piteous, pitiable, pitiful, plaintive, poor, rueful, ruthful, sad, useless, worry. Yes, all of those. That’s how England fans feel about our team. I’ve been pretty supportive, but truthfully I’m getting sick of the worrisome performances from my team. And frankly, World Cup qualification is the least of our worries; worldwide embarrassment seems to be more ostensible at this point.

I don’t know whether the fans at Wembley tonight were booing David Bentley coming on or Frank Lampard coming off, but both are not due. Especially when you cheer David Beckham’s woeful performance (besides Brown’s assist) when he came out of the game. (I love to quote ESPN’s Match Centre commentary by calling him “Copperballs” because he failed to reach a single England player on about 99.9% of his free kicks and corners.) You can’t cheer for some and not all. You’re either a team player or not, and booing puts a big Scarlet letter on your chests, you tergiversators! Look that one up and suck on it!

brown and rio

Personal Note: God was at least on our side for providing the rain when the lads were in their home whites, making them deliciously clingy and basically see through. Thank you for that.

Link: Cole Saves Fabio's Blushes

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