Showing posts with label Danny Cipriani. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Danny Cipriani. Show all posts
31 December 2008
10 November 2008
Broadening My Service Base…
I had originally given my personal assistance invitation to Coleen Rooney and The Beckhams, to which neither of them contacted me with the immediateness I was expecting. (Denial is not just a river in Egypt.) So I’ve realized that I’m going to have to broaden my base of employment. I’ve picked out a few more ladies, and now some lads as well, whom I believe are in need of my personal assistance.
THE LADIES
Alex Gerrard
The good…
and the bad.
With her writing career on the rise, while also perfume hawking, boutique opening, and being a devoted mum and wife, Mrs. Gerrard may need a little schedule keeping. I’d also suggest that she not do any more red carpets without a fashion aid.
Carly Zucker
She’s wicked fit. But she doesn’t really choose the proper outfits all the time. I can appreciate her casual nature, but when you’re someone who gets photographed on a daily basis, you need to make an effort sometimes. Oh, and with the wedding coming up and all, perhaps I can help her find a little extra time to focus on the big nuptials.
Abbey Clancy
A.)I wouldn’t let her wear a see through dress to the red carpet so everyone could get a peek at her leopard print knickers. B.) I generally like her everyday style. I won’t need to fuss with that. C.) I can find you a better interior designer/friend than the fashion disaster that IS Elen Rives.
THE LADS
Danny Cipriani
As a VERY young celebrity (He JUST turned 21 I know, such a baby! Such a GOOD-LOOKING baby… dirty, dirty. Must resist those thoughts.) and rising rugby star, the sponsors will by knocking constantly and the schedule will begin getting hectic VERY soon. I will be there to eliminate unwanted sponsors (like fish oil tablets) and get you out of the daily habit of wearing tracksuits EVERYWHERE!
James McAvoy
After performing in the Academy Award winning film, Atonement, with Kiera Knightley, this actor seems to be on the rise. Alas, he chose to film WANTED with Angelina Jolie. Let me chose some roles that enhance your talents rather than burying them in excessive blood and gore combined with unnecessary computer animation. (So…bad.)
Robert Pattinson
This young actor starred in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire before taking on the other teenage cult book-based film, Twilight. His appearances around the U.S. in preparation for the film’s premiere on November 21st have been crowded and filled with the high-pitched shrieking of young girls (and probably a few high-pitched boys as well). He’s also a musician. He appears randomly at bars in LA and pubs in London, his home town. Needless to say, he’s a busy guy. I could assist with the fan mail (gotta censor the crazies) and help him find time to fulfill both his acting and musical passions (and to get to London more, because, frankly, he’s losing his British accent which is just utterly unacceptable). Also, I would prepare him enough for events that he wouldn’t say something as inappropriate as this.
pictures via google images, jamd, dailymail
THE LADIES
Alex Gerrard
The good…
and the bad.
With her writing career on the rise, while also perfume hawking, boutique opening, and being a devoted mum and wife, Mrs. Gerrard may need a little schedule keeping. I’d also suggest that she not do any more red carpets without a fashion aid.
Carly Zucker
She’s wicked fit. But she doesn’t really choose the proper outfits all the time. I can appreciate her casual nature, but when you’re someone who gets photographed on a daily basis, you need to make an effort sometimes. Oh, and with the wedding coming up and all, perhaps I can help her find a little extra time to focus on the big nuptials.
Abbey Clancy
A.)I wouldn’t let her wear a see through dress to the red carpet so everyone could get a peek at her leopard print knickers. B.) I generally like her everyday style. I won’t need to fuss with that. C.) I can find you a better interior designer/friend than the fashion disaster that IS Elen Rives.
THE LADS
Danny Cipriani
As a VERY young celebrity (He JUST turned 21 I know, such a baby! Such a GOOD-LOOKING baby… dirty, dirty. Must resist those thoughts.) and rising rugby star, the sponsors will by knocking constantly and the schedule will begin getting hectic VERY soon. I will be there to eliminate unwanted sponsors (like fish oil tablets) and get you out of the daily habit of wearing tracksuits EVERYWHERE!
James McAvoy
After performing in the Academy Award winning film, Atonement, with Kiera Knightley, this actor seems to be on the rise. Alas, he chose to film WANTED with Angelina Jolie. Let me chose some roles that enhance your talents rather than burying them in excessive blood and gore combined with unnecessary computer animation. (So…bad.)
Robert Pattinson
This young actor starred in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire before taking on the other teenage cult book-based film, Twilight. His appearances around the U.S. in preparation for the film’s premiere on November 21st have been crowded and filled with the high-pitched shrieking of young girls (and probably a few high-pitched boys as well). He’s also a musician. He appears randomly at bars in LA and pubs in London, his home town. Needless to say, he’s a busy guy. I could assist with the fan mail (gotta censor the crazies) and help him find time to fulfill both his acting and musical passions (and to get to London more, because, frankly, he’s losing his British accent which is just utterly unacceptable). Also, I would prepare him enough for events that he wouldn’t say something as inappropriate as this.
pictures via google images, jamd, dailymail
03 October 2008
Friday Randoms: Dates, Play Dates, Rugby and Secret Aliases
Victoria Beckham, whilst on a play date with Gwen Stefani and son Kingston, wore an awesome retro Madonna t-shirt, baggy jeans, Birkin bag and dVb aviators. I almost like her more when she dresses like a normal human being.
Find your perfect match at FootballFanFinder. It’s a dating site for football fans! BRILLIANT!
Didier Drogba will be facing only a month out rather than a much longer recovery as originally expected. He suffered no ligament damage during the game against Cluj midweek, and is looking to be back by November after recovering from a badly twisted knee and ankle. But this still leaves Chelsea with just ONE experienced striker, Nicolas Anelka. Lets hope he can keep playing like he has been and not relapse to his performances of last season.
According to popbitch, Coleen Rooney books cabs under the name Jane Aspinall.
Joe Kinnear doesn’t know how to talk to the press. And I don’t think his vocabulary extends far beyond c**t and f**k. (If you read the transcript closely, he curses 52 times.) Oh, and I think he might be illiterate.
Danny Cipriani is back for the Wasps, and his super-supportive girlfriend, Kelly Brook was there to cheer him on. He’s looking good in those shorts.
pictures via dailymail, google images, and jamd
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